Posted on April 1, 2013

Blogger of Sex in Saudi Arabia

Talks

 

The very popular Saudi native Dr. Abdul Al-lily has made a name for himself amongst the blogosphere as venturing and uninhibited. The brainchild behind the blog “Sex & Beyond: Saudi” Dr. Abdul creates a safe haven for people to unload their sexual queries. His blog is informative, well researched, thought provoking and entertaining. If this isn’t enough, Dr.
Abdul Al-Lily further impresses with an ivy-league doctorate and masters and currently holds the title Professor at the regional university.
Based in Saudi Arabia, a highly conservative, restrictive Islamic society, his pursuit to challenge the social norms does not go unnoticed. After much success, on the blog, Saudi officials decided to ban the blog in the Saudi domain. Thus, you cannot view the blog while in Saudi Arabia. Our readers and myself couldn’t be deterred so easily, so without further delay I give you a peek into the thoughts of Dr. Abdul Al-lily.

1.  How did the blog “Sex and Beyond: Saudi Arabia” come to be? Have you always been interested in sexual interaction, when did your interest peek?
The idea of the Blog is inspired by the social life I experienced during my stay in Oxford. Of course, everybody knows the iconic Oxford images: cloister-like medieval colleges, manicured quads, lofty spires, etc.; but Oxford has a secret identity that many non-students will never realize – it is an outstanding place to witness dating, gossip, and sexual mayhem. Each of Oxford’s 38 colleges are miniature communities full of ambitious and, oftentimes, sexually-liberated young men and women from all over the globe. You can image the results. Some of my friends would describe the college community as a place where “everyone gossips about everyone else and where everyone sleeps with everyone.” So, as a Saudi based in Oxford, I felt I was exposed to two sexually controversial environments. One is the environment of Saudi Arabia, which people claim is dysfunctional in terms of dating and sex. The other is the environment of Oxford, which seems to be far more “free” in terms of dating and beyond. This controversial feeling has motivated me to kick off this blog. So, the concern of the blog is to look into sex relations and cultural dichotomies. This concern is heightened by my career researching social discourses and power relations.
2. Your blog has been recently blocked by Saudi officials and is inaccessible in the Saudi domain. Were you given any prior warning? If so/not were you shocked by the event?
I am told by my legal counsel not to discuss most of the details. Nevertheless, I can say that I am disappointed at this blocking, but at the same time the cultural authorities must also be disappointed at me. I am disappointed at them for blocking the website and therefore for interrupting my two intentions: 1) to help Saudis become sexually aware; and 2) to help Western partners of Saudi Arabians understand the sexual norms of Saudi culture and
therefore improve their relationships. On the other hand, the cultural authorities must be disappointed at me for opening up Saudi culture to the outside world and therefore for destabilising the private nature of Saudi culture.
3. How has being blocked in the Saudi domain affected the blog? Did it in any way diminish your efforts in continuing the blog?
It does not affect me, as I am technically capable of going around the blocking system, accessing and updating the blog. The blocking of my blog has actually helped to enhance the publicity of the blog and make the international community more sympathetic. After the blog has been blocked in Saudi Arabia, I have received many messages from non-Saudis lending support. This reminds me of a saying common in Saudi Arabia: ‘It is possible that
something intended to hurt you turns out to benefit you.’
4. The images on your blog are quite controversial and some may view them as offensive. What do you say to those with such views? Do you feel that the images may deter people from reading the blog? In turn limiting your readership?
I apologise to anyone who finds these photos offensive. I thought they were merely artworks with some creativity. Speaking of the photos, I have actually been looking for a sponsor to fund an exhibition of these photos abroad, if anyone is interested.
5. You’ve been educated abroad, and correspondingly spent a large amount of your early adult life outside Saudi. From personal experience, what would you say is the single most differing factor about sexual acceptance between Saudi Arabia and The West?
This question requires a philosophical answer. One might argue that sex is a limitation of the human nature, and therefore that humans will never find the right strategy for addressing sex. For example, Saudi society has looked for the right way of bringing the two genders together (i.e.through arranged marriage) but ended up with a high rate of divorce. Likewise,
the West has been searching for the right way of bringing the two sex together but ended up with many cases of breaking-up and divorce.
6. For the readers, are you currently in the market (single)? If so, why? Is there a sexual component to the discourse?
Whether I am single or not is the puzzle I would like the readers to figure out!
7. What is your stance on premarital sex? Agree/Disagree? Why? In other words, I know for sure that you have not been married yet, but the question that many readers seek an answer to is: are you a virgin?
I do not want to release whether I am a virgin or not since this is a private matter, but if I had sex before marriage and admitted this publicly, I would be probably the second Saudi of all time making this ‘confession.’ The first one was actually a guy who showed on the TV and talked openly about his sexual experiences before marriage, but because of this confession he was sentenced by a Saudi court to 1000 lashes and 5 years in prison. I was wondering if the readers of this interview would think that it would be wise if a Saudi person admitted publically that s/he had sex before marriage. In Saudi Arabia, it is believed that all the sins made in private and kept in private are forgiven, but those sins made in private but released to the public are not forgiven. This belief might be seen to explain why Saudi society is a private domain but with possibilities of many sins hidden and keptin private.
8. What would be the strangest or most unique sexual experience you’ve come to know of since having the blog?
It is perhaps the experience of Exotic Escort (Link Here), who actually acts as both an academic and escort; two roles that appear not to be compatible with one another.
9. Your blog posts are based on case studies referring to others, have any of your blog posts been autobiographical? Or is the blog solely non-personal?
It is non-personal as I am trying to act as an observer. It is actually quite difficult not to incorporate private experiences but only observations.
10. Islam clearly states that anal sex is forbidden, what is your take on the issue? A large component of sexual education in personal sexuality. One of which is homosexuality, what is your take on it? Has your blog encountered any queries about homosexual experiences?
I have written about these issues in my blog, and I would like to take this opportunity to invite the readers to visit the blog.
11. On a final note, would you leave the readers with
what your ultimate date would be like? (I’m joking.)(Feel free to answer)
 Lady Gaga!
 
My sincerest thanks to you  and wish your blog further growth and prosperity!
View Dr. Abdul Al-Lily’s blog here: https://ssbts55.wordpress.com

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